I'm a Bad Mom

April Fool!  That's actually a cat, not a plant!  Fooled ya!

Isis had to go to the vet today.  She has a growth on her gums, which, as it turns out, is just a fleshy swelling, common in older dogs (but most commonly seen in Boxers).  The only potential problem is that it might overgrow the tooth, at which point she could chew on the growth, causing it to bleed.  So, for now we're keeping an eye on it.  It might stop growing.  It might shrink.  We also might have it removed...

...because Isis' teeth are full of plaque.  And she's fat.  So I feel really guilty.  I can make a million excuses about why I don't brush her teeth more often or make sure she gets more exercise.  But the truth of the matter is, I get so focused on Indiana sometimes, because she is so high maintenance, and I neglect Isis.  I don't mean neglect as in "I don't meet her basic needs," because I meet her basic needs and then some.  But I don't focus on some of things of lesser importance (though still important), like dental hygiene and regular exercise.  I certainly don't love Isis any less than I do Indiana, but I suppose a person can only focus on so many things at once, and when Indiana has so many things of life-and-death importance to focus on, that leaves less room for "incidentals."  I feel really bad about that.  Isis has so few needs and demands.  I love her to bits.  And I feel like I've let her down. 

Pending blood test results, we may opt for dental surgery to clean her teeth and remove the gum growth.  That would give her (well, really me) a clean start, so to speak, where I could clean her teeth as often as I really should, so this never happens again.  And we've already started exercising her more, but now we know how often we should do it and for how long.  She's also starting a diet, and we've got a firm daily calorie amount to follow every day, which will be easy for us to do. 

So even though I know we can, and will, do this for Isis, I still feel really guilty.  I want to have given her more before now.  I hate that she often comes second to Indiana.  So sweet, so understanding, so undemanding.  She deserves better.  And I vow to do better by her.