Q*bert, not being naughty
We have one counter in the kitchen where the cats are not allowed. One surface in the entire 2000 square feet of our home. And it's not verboten because we're mean. In the middle of this counter is the stove, which, because we eat, is hot multiple times per day. So restricting access to this counter is really an attempt to prevent little burned feline toesies. We're actually being nice. Around here, we refer to the restricted counter as "The Naughty Counter."
Mr. Squiggles "gets" The Naughty Counter. So does Gus. Samson knows he's not supposed to be on it, and only jumps up there post-dinner to steal food. (And as soon as we walk in, he jumps down. SO NAUGHTY) But Q*bert...ahhhhh, Q*bert. I do love you, dear cat.
Q*bert jumps up on The Naughty Counter an average of probably 20 times per day, and that's honestly being conservative. Q only jumps up on The Naughty Counter while we're preparing animal meals, which is not only naughty but really, really annoying. There have been meals where he's jumped up probably 15 times during one preparation period. As you can imagine, this slows the process down considerably. Stopping every 30 seconds to pluck a cat off of the counter becomes really counterproductive. And he jumps into the middle of the 8 bowls I have spread around me, and he tries to steal morsels of food out of the bowls. Sometimes he's successful, and as you're lifting him to the ground, he takes his little paw and shoves the food back in his mouth so it doesn't fall out. This kills me every time. But cute or not, it's still reaaaaaaallly annoying.
Last week, as I was lifting Q off The Naughty Counter for the dozenth time, I looked into his eyes, and it occurred to me that he does not understand what I am doing. He does not understand the cause and effect. I could see it in his face. Here I am, thinking that, after a while, he'll eventually understand that when you jump on The Naughty Counter, you get lifted off; therefore, we are not meant to be on The Naughty Counter. But I understood in that moment that Q will never make that connection. I am no longer hopeful that eventually he'll get it. Because he won't. My future involves thousands and thousands of struggles over food. I will lift that cat off of the counter three times a day for the rest of his life. And you know what? Now that I've accepted that, it doesn't seem so bad. Is it annoying? Sure. But it's now a part of life. And I'm pretty sure this means the cat has won. Well played, cat. Well played.
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3 comments:
Have you tried the squirt bottle?
We are going through something similar with our Henry cat. It's not about getting on a counter, but it is about eating HIS food, instead of the other boys' food. He needs a special diet, but he won't eat if isolated. So, we're trying to teach him to only eat out of his bowl. Well... I don't think he'll ever get it. There's food in the other bowls, so he should be able to eat it, right? Grrr. The other boys seem to have it all worked out. They just leave Henry's alone!
These cats - they really do rule us, don't they? :)
Absolutely, Tammy! I feel your pain. We're going to have to try separating our cats too, thanks to antibiotics for all of them, and I know already that that's not going to go over well. I feel your pain!
Lee--yes, I did the squirt bottle thing too! That's partly what led me to the conclusion that Q was never going to get it. I squirted him, he acted betrayed and confused, he licked himself dry, and then her jumped right back on the counter. Fun times!
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